Oru zimble jeevacharitram - Part 1

(Reluctant) Statutory Disclaimer : The post(s) that follows is a long-windedly, incredibly, shamelessly self-centred one. It traces the past and present of yet another insignificant keeda who crawls arounds these days in the biggest keeda-hill of them all a.k.a. Mooombhaiii.

A friend of mine suggested recently that my blog should contain a little more about ME. But wasn't this already all about me and my antics/thoughts/blahblahblah?? Oh well, whatever. I hereby bow to public opinion. (Okayyyy, so less than half a dozen people follow my blog!! Here goes.

Zahra is NOT my real name. That should've been pretty workable. I chose not to write under my real name for the simple reason that I write more freely under an assumed one. No inhibitions whatsoever about what if so and so reads this, what will such and such think et al. Those who know me in person may be able to figure out my identity from what I write here, but that's fine by me.

And thus I began looking for a fairly simple yet not too common name. Came across a coupla sites that gave the meaning as grace and elegance. Some others even mentioned that it was the Urdu/Hebrew/Arabic equivalent of flower. Not bad at all. Quite nice in fact. Since grace and elegance are qualities I kept (and still keep) aspiring to, I decided to let it reflect in my nom-de-plume. Oh I saw that half-smile, btw.

My real name is nothing to write home about. I can tell you it's not Priya. In fact, I'm telling you it's not Priya, 'coz that's what I was almost named. Apparently my dad threw a spanner in the works by gently reminding mom of something. That guys in Kerala colleges have this thing for singing 'O Priye' to girls with the name. The musically challenged would only call it out. Talk about far-sighted. I suspect he knows much more than he lets on. First hand experience on the singing side perhaps, but he insists on maintaining SUCH a gentlemanly front. :(

Now that Priya had been chucked outta the window...the name, silly... the hunt began for other nice names. Some friend suggested 'Angela' which (thankfully) was rejected outright. There's such a complete absence of anything angelic in me. Boohoo. Some more names came and went. And then a propah Christian name popped up. Sounded pretty starchy when said out loud, but mom discovered she actually liked the legitimate shorter version of it. Typical Mallu trait, lemme tell you...this fondness for short and sweet 4-5 letter names. Of course the sweetness quotient depends on whether you're named Jijo/Biji, or manage to get away with Paul/Mary.

The whole family concurred and yours truly was promptly carted off to church. There, the priest dangled me over the baptismal font and solemnly intoned, “I baptize thee...

...... ***** ******....

...in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.” Followed by the sprinkling of water and the drawing of a cross on a sleeping infant. I'm told I slept through my own baptism...to my mother's eternal embarrassment!! Probably the first of my many displays of unflappable cool. (Ahem!) Btw I wasn't named according to the great Mallu X'ian baby naming formula though... in case you haven't read that email fwd, do let me know. :)

I was born in Kerala, yes, but that's the only event of any significance in my life to have happened there. Spent the first 13 years of my life as a typical 'Gelfie' Mallu. Methinks we fulfilled every stereotype, except one. I speak Malayalam fluently, and read it too. I'd even go so far as to say that I can give my (for want of a better term) 'native Mallu' cousins a run for their money. In fact, if the VJ's on TV are anything to go by, then I'd qualify for a PhD in advanced Malayalam.

Then we heeded the tug that band-bajaofies on NRI heartstrings and came back to India for good. To join an established yet fast growing community of Non Resident Keralites or NRK's. To live in a land which is not in Kerala but is not so far away as to make you miss it terribly. That speaks a language very similar to, yet totally different from mine. Which was known as Madras in olden days and is now Chennai.

That's short for Chennappanaickapattinam btw. Thank God they shortened it. Can you imagine a flight announcement with that name? So, in this city I got my first taste of convent school life, Madras bhashai, brilliant choirs, Kollywood dominated politics and...siiiighhhhh...filter kaapi. It's so sweet to recall the beginnings of a lasting romance. Dunno if this applies to situations involving humans though.

A few weeks in Chennai, and the first of my many revelations hit me. And so I knelt down and prayed.

I thank Thee Lord, for Thy many mercies
'Specially Marina beach and milaga bajjis
But most of all, that my parents dear
Did not name me Priya and bring me here

Y'see, every third female in this city is a Priya or a variant of it. Priya, Padmapriya, Vishnupriya, Lakshmipriya, Haripriya....heck, even Priyamvada. Now you get the priya...sorry, point. Archana's and Divya's are a dime-a-dozen too.

All-girls school (a first for me) was a riot. Missed my old school terribly but had loadsa giggles at the nuns' rules and regulations. Bless them, Thanks to life there, there are some unchanging aspects to my life as I live it today. Oh yeah, my soda-kuppi glasses didn't help my cause, but made some amazing friends despite it all.

Then came graduation at a local women's arts and science college where urstruly discovered some 70% of herself. Women's college, so the Priya hullaballoo was for nothing after all. Had been given up by half the family/friends circle for not taking the more respectable job-and-groom-assuring med/engg/science route. Point to be noted here.... full marks to my parents for sticking to their guns and backing me all the way. All you folks who still believe that Science is THE Holy Grail.... by all means stick to your beliefs...but pls do pause to think of how hurtful those dismissive looks and comments can really be. Oh, they motivate all right, but not in the right kinda way.

Anyway, those three years taught me a few (hitherto unknown) things about myself. That I could actually write if I put my mind to it. That I could lead a group and work in fairly undefined situations without too much trouble. Most importantly, that I could stick out like a sore thumb in any crowd (which I did quite effortlessly) AND not give a damn. Life hasn't been the same since that discovery.

And a little keeda of an idea that I should do an MBA after this popped up. I've made my reasons for doing an MBA lamentably clear in an earlier post.

WHAT?!?!?!? You haven't read it??? Fie, dear reader...here it is. Point 7, FYI.

More later.... if you aren't choking already that is.. ;-)